How to Fall in Love With Your ‘Self’
Sounds dreamy doesn’t it, to be so completely in love with yourself that you have this amazing life where you can smile freely? Some people don’t believe it is possible, but that’s only because they haven’t experienced it or they don’t want it to be true. I always knew it was possible and now I am experiencing it in real time.
I have come from a place of not deeming myself worthy enough to be happy/successful/loved etc to now where I am in a place where I am falling in love with myself more and more every day.
As a result of this I wake up happy (I used to wake up stressed); I look at the life I am building and think, ‘wow, this is wonderful’ (I used to always be looking for the next thing I could buy) and even though I face the challenges all humans do (it’s called the school of life for a reason!) I know that I can always come back to the pureness of my being - the True Self.
‘Self-Love’ you see on social media is very different from the type of Self-love I am speaking about. The self-love on social media seems to be all bubble baths, buying yourself flowers and a Reiki session. Disclaimer - I do this too! But not to prove to myself that I love myself and not in absence of doing the work on myself.
In order to truly fall in love with yourself (and your life) you have to be prepared to get your hands dirty. You have to be prepared to go to the depths of your subconscious mind that most people steer clear of because it can be painful. You MUST do the deep inner work and it is not for the faint hearted.
You cannot truly love a person if you only choose to love the nice bits you see on the surface, when you know deep down there is more. This is the same when it comes to loving yourself. You cannot truly love yourself without facing all aspects of yourself - this includes your Shadow self.
Your shadow is a part of your psyche made up of the elements of your personality that your ego didn’t believe would keep you safe. So your ego pushed them away, deep into your subconscious mind.
Your external world is a reflection of your internal world, everything you see in your reality is a reflection of your mind. Everything is a projection of your mind.
So when you are experiencing people who trigger you or people you deeply admire, the aspects of them that you like or dislike are parts of your own personality that your ego has pushed into your subconscious mind - you then project them onto other people because these aspects of you so want to be seen and to be a part of you.
Most humans fear rejection, yet we are rejecting parts of ourselves every single day as we push elements into our shadow.
So as you begin to consciously create your life, step into the dream life you desire, you need to integrate your shadow - only then can you truly fall in love with your Self and take your power back as the creator.
The three steps to self-love that must come before buying yourself flowers are:
Begin taking responsibility for your life, YOU are the powerful creator.
Understand that you are so much more than the stories your ego is telling you. By peeling back the layers of the ego you will connect more deeply with your True Self and show up as her every day.
Get to know your whole personality, including your Shadow. Then you can love and accept yourself to make yourself whole.
All human beings crave a feeling of wholeness, this is why we do all the things, buy all the things and want all the things, because we do not feel whole. In reality we already are whole but we have to step out of this illusion of separation.
By stepping out of this illusion of separation and fear we can come back to love and create our lives from that place - this is when you can truly fall in love.